Friday, February 1, 2013

my black polish is chipping

Last weekend, I painted my nails black.
It's been a ridiculously long time since I've done that.
D asked if there was a reason...because there usually is.

When I'm peppy, my nails are salsa colored. Soaking up sun? bubblegum pink
Sophisticated feeling? I go for a creamy nude or ballet pink Trendy? taupe or grey Tired? clear
Rebellious? black...every time.

Maybe, I knew, in the quiet crevices of my mind, what kind of a week I was about to have...

It's been a hard one at the Alsey household.
 I haven't been the best wife, definitely not winning any mom awards, and life hasn't been really pretty- it's shown us sickness, stress, pain, fear. I've felt like I wasn't enough, wasn't succeeding, and certainly wasn't in control.

It hasn't been really pretty, but it has been beautiful.

It's during the hard days, weeks, months that I find myself thinking, saying, and clinging to Jesus.
I once chose this as my life verse. Problem is, it's a tricky one to live out.

“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. John 15:5
 
Turns out it true though.
 
 

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